Ever notice how easy it is to fall into a rut? We do it a lot, I think. We go to the same places for lunch or dinner. Or make the same meals week after week. We go to the same stores for things we need. We watch the same shows over and over. It’s even easy to fall into a rut with hobbies, or exercise routines. And let’s not forget work. A place that might be easiest to fall into a rut. The thing about being in a rut is that it’s cozy and comfortable. Like a warm numbing blanket. Or maybe like that warm cozy bed on a cold rainy morning when the alarm has gone off way too early. It’s comfortable and we don’t tend to be in too big of a hurry to get up, no matter how bad we have to pee.
I’ve managed to sink into a few ruts over the past few years. Some of my ruts even have ruts. I was there before I even noticed. And I was good at rationalizing what I was doing there. I couldn’t travel easily because it was hard to find pet sitters. I wasn’t going out because I hadn’t met someone. I wasn’t this because of work. I wasn’t that because I didn’t have someone to do that with. Much of those rationalizations were really just excuses. But I could make them sound like good reasons for not doing something. Or more correctly, not doing something different.
The problem with ruts is not only that they are comfortable, it can be difficult to see you are in one. Especially the big one where all your little ruts live. If we’re lucky, someone will try to point out that we’re in a rut, or five, and we will actually listen to them and then be able to see it for our self. Most of us, might be lucky enough to have someone point out the rut, we just won’t be able to see it. We have all those rationalizations and the person pointing it out just doesn’t understand or we think they don’t see the whole picture. Been there, done that, got all the swag.
It took some time to even see that I was in a rut. I was making small adjustments to address a few things that I knew I wanted or needed to change. Since I was working on change, how could I be in a rut? Then I had an experience with someone that afterwards let me, or made me start to examine what it was about that experience that I wanted to hold onto. And that’s when I found myself standing in a big fat, freaking rut, right in the middle of my life. So, I had that experience as a recent, in your face, tantalizing example and then, as it turned out, I had a friend that, when he popped up one day in my message app, I realized was another example. The two experiences combined were a bit like looking at that mirror in Harry Potter that shows you whatever your heart desires. Though mine is still a little fuzzy around the edges and there are a few smudges here and there. Holy smokes. I’ve fallen into a rut, or maybe twelve. Now what to do about that?
As it turns out, there is a phrase or saying I heard many times when I was growing up that is a big part of the answer to the problem of being stuck in a rut. “If you always do, what you always did, you always get what you always got.” The catch is, you have to know you are in the rut in the first place.
So have I started to climb out of some of the ruts in my life. I’ve started with small things. For example, I’d like a brand new shiny car. However, mine is paid for and I have other financial priorities right now. So I cleaned my car up, on the inside, I haven’t done the outside yet, so that it looks nice. It doesn’t look neglected or mistreated. Something else I’ve been working on for a few months is my wardrobe. I discovered that the shirts I was wearing to work were wearing out. Which meant I needed to replace them. I did that and then realized that I needed to change-up my style some. Except, I don’t like to shop for clothes. So, I got help. I signed up for one of the online services that periodically send you clothes to try and you keep what you like, send back what you don’t. This has really forced my out of my comfort zone and out of my clothing rut. Though that one is a really deep rut so there’s still more work to do.
Those are just a couple of the more recent adjustments I’ve been making. Certainly the painting in my home this year qualifies, as does all the learning and playing guitar that I’ve been doing. I think in the last year and a half, I’ve learned more and come farther than at any other time. I’m really pleased with that. It has played a part of the climb out of a few ruts, not just my music skills rut.
There are more. Like I said, the big ol’ rut in the middle of my life is made up of a bunch of small ruts. I’ll be working on more of them in the weeks and months to come. I’m kind of excited about it. I’m looking forward to seeing what comes of it all.
As I mentioned in the last post. There was a Blues Jam. I did attend. I have video. I probably have something to write about it, however, I need to review the video again and also get it edited so I can post it for all to see. That might not happen before the next jam which is coming up this weekend. I’m also still studying for my test. I have it scheduled. It is for a week after my practice tests expire. I was worried about that until I found the option to extend my access to them for 10 days. I’m also less than a month from my trip to Australia. That means it’s time to get down to the business of the details, like what to pack, what to do regarding money, what to do to take my phone, what to pack. And oh yeah, my ride to and from the airport. Details. Details.